Sunday, November 18, 2007

In your absence

*chingu




I had a dream last night. It was about him. It was a dream that made me cry in the morning after finding out that everything was not real.

I was online looking at my messenger and finding him there under the sign name- +488- - ( I could no longer remember the rest of the digits). He was talking to me and pasting some poem that I once sent him as though trying to remind me how I once believed in every word I once wrote in it. The poem came in with a background image that seemed like an aquarium. Or were they clouds? I don't know... I cannot remember well. All I can recall is that, the backdrop was blue and the file was supposed to be the original file that I once gave him.

I also remember how I suddenly had to hurry back to my laptop fearing he had logged off while I was away. But I found him still there...and that made me very happy.

I woke up. My laptop was off and there wasn't such a thing as that kind of messenger online. It wasn't Yahoo, nor was it MSN or ICQ. Nothing like AOL, or the ones i knew of. If his sign name were a zip code, of which country? If I indeed sent him such a poem, why couldn't I remember a single phrase in it?

I could not remember our online conversation well but I do remember how I felt while he was there talking to me. It felt just exactly like the old times. I found him sweet, loving, and well-missed.

What could this dream mean? Does he miss me too? Is he trying to tell me a message? If so, what? Does he still believe we are soulmates? Does he still think of Somehow...Someday...Somewhere? Does he still love me?


1 comment:

Viktor Hart said...

There are times that I am waiting for your messages...or waiting for you to start a conversation everytime I catch you online...but you are busy or idle.

Love triangle.

You desire him. I desire you.

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